Sunday, May 21, 2006

B not starting Kindergarten.

Almost forgot. We had a meeting with B's Child Study Team (CST) at his elementary school on Friday. Looks like we'll be waiting to start Kindergarten.

Can't say I'm happy about that. On the most superficial level, I never would have (a) had another baby or (b) bought a new house if I EVER thought I was going to have three kids in daycare at the same time.

On a slightly deeper level, I'm sad because he's SO bright, I really believe he's intellectually ready for school. But his CST is so concerned about his arm-flapping, toe-walking, and impulsivity, they really think we should wait.

What helped us make the decision to wait (we were so against it!) was talking to other parents. Since we are in one of the nation's top school districts, it seems things have gotten very competitive around here. Lots of parents whose kids were born in the summer (like B, an August baby) wait until the following year to start their kids in school. Which means that not only might B be the youngest if he starts next year, he'll be the youngest by FAR. And apparently, kids around here are dating and fooling around by the sixth grade (was that vomit I just tasted?) and the age/maturity difference between B and the others might be so profound, that the social damage could be irreparable.

And nevermind that in this town full of over-achievers, being 10-11 months younger means he'd have to work that much harder to keep up academically, too.

Seems parents of kids without learning disabilities make the decision to wait - sometimes at birth!- so we'll do it while we can. Once we start public kindergarten, there's no going back. At this stage, he won't realize what we're doing, and he's happy to stay at his daycare another year with Oz. (Iggy will be there too in the winter.) If we held him back once he was in the public school system, he'd realize it -- and so would the other kids.

The plan for next year is to put him the Kindergarten class at his daycare (it's certified, but I doubt it's as good as the public school) but send him to the preschool disabled program he's currently attending. Right now, a mini bus picks him up at daycare and takes him to and from the program in the afternoons. Next year, it will be the same.

The CST said he had really made improvements since starting the preschool disabled program in January. Their feeling was that he should have all or nearly all of his problems ironed out by next year.

Their also sending him for a full development evaluation at the great hospital nearby. They're concerned about the physcality of his issues -- the arm flapping, toe walking and head shaking, which all look like autism. He's clearly not autistic, but they'd like him to have an eval. just in case.

Fine by me. I've been trying to get an appointment for an evaluation there for MONTHS and I can't even get a return phone call! I'm taking him to a pediatric neurologist next month at the other nearby hospital...but I'm really glad they're getting us in with other doctors.

I absolutely don't think B is "on the spectrum," but we'll see.

1 comment:

Baby Jacob said...

Have you ever looked into tourettes syndrome? My husband has this and these were similar symptoms my husband had as a child! My husband not only had the "tics" but was also a little obsessive compulsive... but I remember his mother telling me he would shake his arm and look at it as if it was doing it out of his control and other awkward things like that.... just a thought!